Showing posts with label children. Show all posts
Showing posts with label children. Show all posts

Thursday, May 22, 2008

My Favorite Picture


What picture is on your wallpaper on your computer?? This is the one I like to see every day. It captures so much--the glee and arms up and out of the granddaughter, and James' great smile. Taken back at Christmas time, everyone still in their jammies. I love how the granddaughter crosses her little ankles. And to the right is where I sit and read stuff on the computer. And blog. And talk on the phone. Glass bowl of yarn for knitting dishrags, and address book at my fingertips.

I miss you James. Thanks for calling and telling us about your first full day in the Army. I am so thankful Dad bought us a new phone so that we can both talk to you at the same time.

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Motherhood

Thirty years ago, we got married. Twenty-seven years ago, I entered motherhood. And I am convinced that once a mom, always a mom. Motherhood is such a hands on job, and while I had great teachers, I enjoyed reading everything I could about the subject.

I have been labeled a very overprotective mom. Call me worst-case-scenerio mom. Its a badge I wear with honor. Its a compliment. While my three boys suffered the usual ear infections, and broken bones from climbing---one on Ronald McDonald, and on a jungle gym (no longer found on most playgrounds)--one off a swing at the park, one off a junior bed, one off a chair at Sunday School, one off a swing at camp. I only remember one trip to the emergency room for stitches, when the youngest was horsing around in the youth Sunday School room with a board, a table and a girl.

Even without children in residence or underfoot, I now view the whole world through the eyes of a mom. It is like we are issued the eyes of a mom when the sperm and egg are joined at conception. Maybe the eyes of a mom develop with baby dolls, and babysitting. And I did lots and lots of babysitting. First, with my younger brothers, then neighborhood children at fifty cents and hour, and even after I had a job as an orthodontist assistant, I babysat for my bosses' children.

Even during those babysitting days, little boys were easier to babysit. They entertained themselves pretty well with toy cars and tools. Baby girls were different. Little girls like to talk.

And while other people's children's diapers could make me gag, once I had my own, there was nothing gross or too hard to do. I was not raised around bugs--roaches, in particular. But, the south has an overabundance, and before kids, I would scream like a girl when confronted by a "water bug" (roach big enough to ride). But, after my firstborn was in my arms, I could stomp cockroaches like a pro. The mother hen in me rose up to protect my baby. And that mother hen in me has never left.

I wear my now grown sons out with admonishments to wear a hat, and "don't forget your coat" and "did you close and lock the front door?" My mother trained me well. Most illness can be traced back to a problem with elimination. And low-flow toilets don't help big boys and their big boy poops. Fiber is our friend. Are you drinking enough water???

Anita Renfroe did a great rendition of what all a mom says in the course of a day set to the tune of the William Tell overture. So many of my phrases will resound through my sons brains for years to come--and hopefully said unto their dear children, or discarded as no longer applicable as they study the latest in science and health.

Mom is a verb. It is what we do. It is how we think. It is my signature. I will step in if I sense a child in danger. For instance, at a store, if there is an unaccompanied child...look out.

When I worked in the lunchroom at my sons' elementary school for a few years, it seemed so natural to perform the Heimlich maneuver on a boy choking on a piece of Halloween candy. I had read about it, and with the literature also warned how it sometimes causes the child to throw up. The school nurse was so impressed that she contacted the newspapers and city hall. I was just being a mom.

Motherhood also brought me back to my faith. More about that next post.

Friday, December 28, 2007

Abuelita Dolls

Wal-mart is selling Abuelita Dolls. A google search reveals creators who desired to preserve their Hispanic culture. The dolls sing childhood songs. What a great idea.

When I first saw the dolls at the store, I made the connection to what the little guy next door called me.

When I saw the dolls featured in the store mailbox ad, I paused and wondered what exactly do little girls DO with a gray haired doll?? Little girls seem naturally wired to feed, craddle, rock, and put to bed with little blankets, their ordinary dolls, but what do they do with dolls that look like grannie?? Before I went to the website and figured out that the dolls sing songs, I wondered if my granddaughter needed a doll that resembled me to help remember me?? Until someone comes out with a grannie that sings in French, English and German, this one may do just fine. Little kids can sometimes pick up languages easier than us old folks.

A missed teaching moment

I am fat. I know it. But, the issue of this post is how to deal with little kids that state the obvious much to the embarrassment of their parents.

There is a certain age, say four or five or six, where little kids state the obvious. And while taught to be honest, they don't quite understand why they are in trouble with their parents.

When I laugh, I jiggle. This is fascinating to little kids. Or, maybe I remind them of Jabba the Hut in the Star Wars movie they just got to see.

The conversation goes something like this:

"Hey, lady, you are fat!"

(Their mortified parents call their name in such a manner and tone that they know they are in trouble, but are not sure just why, and so it does not seem fair.)

"But, mom, she IS fat !"

What should I say in such circumstances?? It is somehow okay to tell people they are beautiful, handsome, good, loved, but how do we teach children tact? How do we tell them it is not good manners to point out the obvious for example, that they are missing a limb, short, ugly, different?

I used to tell my boys when they were little the lame, "well, we don't want to hurt their feelings". Being short or ugly or missing a limb is not something folks can easily fix or change. Fat, is another issue. Fat is bad. Fat is unhealthly. Fat is repulsive. Fat is dangerous. And it does not matter if you go to the doctor's office to seek treatment for that sore throat or hacking cough, the doctor and nurses will be sure to point out you are fat, in case you had not walked by a mirror lately.

Any ideas??