Last night at Bible Class, our pastor was trying to explain a concept to our biggest (and rowdiest) crowd. Instead of marveling that Jesus was dying on the cross as the Lamb of God, the actual once-for-all sacrifice, the religious crowd was back at the temple during the cruicifiction slaughtering little lambs for Passover. It was no accident that Jesus chose to die for the sins of the whole world on Passover. Because for centuries, God had passed over the sins postponing the judgement to the only perfect, sinless man who could bear this unique substitutionary work that Jesus was born to do. Ruling the world will come after---at Jesus' second advent.
Just like a man who loves his wife carries around a picture of her to show and worship instead of the real woman, the Jews were thinking that killing lambs was going to remove their sins. The lamb sacrifice was a picture of the coming Lamb of God. The promised Messiah. The Savior of the World.
I leaned over to Bob and snarked that carrying a picture of the wife would be easier. And Bob snorted in laughter, which made the pastor ask what the joke was. And instead of pointing to me and saying the woman God gave me said it would be easier to carry the picture than his wife, Bob just said it would be easier to carry the picture--which made everyone offer him a ride home, as they assumed I'd be mad. Ha. I just smiled.
Now I have been compiling a list of why a picture of the wife would be easier than an actual wife:
a picture would not talk back
a picture would not ask you to read her rambling blogs
a picture might not make you coffee in the morning, but at least you would not have to work around her big butt
a picture would not need food, clothing, visits to the chiropractor
a picture of your wife would be a better listener
Can you think of more? Its a game. a challenge. a quest.
Now I have an excuse to go to glamour shots. Do those places still exist?
the whole pointy sharp elbows. mine are especially rought this time of year
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6 comments:
A picture wouldn't say "do you need directions?"
A picture wouldn't catch the stove/kitchen on fire! Sorry Joyce I couldn't resist.
A picture would keep her ring on. - okay that's below the belt. You don't have to approve this message.
No, Mrs. JP---I love it!! There is something refreshing and wicked about this dark humor. Maybe I am liking it tooooo much. ha
A picture would not need to stop and go to the bathroom way more than you.
A picture doesn't need three kinds of conditioner.
Pictures don't fart. (Bob's contribution)
Pictures never misspeak.
A picture would give you privacy.
A picture would not ask, "what are you thinking?"
A picture would not thrash around with indigestion.
nor would a picture overeat.
A picture would not throw you off your routine by cooking bacon and eggs at 4:30 in the morning.
Have I already listed how a picture would not snore?
a picture would not walk too slow across the parking lot. You would not have to drag a picture.
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